Roger Gastman Goes To The Movies: Project X

I was so excited when I saw previews for Project X. I put the release date on my calendar and everything. Planned to see it on the first screening. I’m lazy I suck and I didn’t. Several of my friends called and emailed and texted and told me to stop everything I was doing and go see it that second. I finally went by myself cuz I’m a loser.

I am still shaking from it. It’s like someone went into my brain and took a zillion of my life experiences, and dumb things we dreamed happening (midget in an oven). I didn’t laugh once during the movie. My eyes didn’t blink. I don’t know how I’m going to sleep tonight. Like I think that movie was real. I’m confused. Now I know how war vets feel when they see war movies and have a flash back.

Also, the movie takes place in Pasadena. I was there today at my DR. for my yearly check up. Once again he didn’t believe me that I don’t do drugs or smoke or drink. Motherfucker. But he was psyched on me cuz I lost close to 20lbs since I was there last. Don’t worry people, I am still a fat fuck.

You know where I am going to be Wednesday, Thursday and every night the rest of this week? That’s right, by myself at the movies watching Project X over and over again. The only downside is that I didn’t eat my peanut M&Ms or drink my Barqs Root Beer – I was too taken in by the film. True cinema. Big Shout out to my dawg Eugene Levy & Stiffler’s mom in the American Pie Reunion film preview I saw before Project X.

Roger Gastman

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