“Wanted: Friends that will partake in awesome stuff”
– A lonely bro in D.C. is looking for some company
“I’d like the world to know the largest and best one came from the States… I’ve always had a dream of fame and fortune for Elmo,”
– An American man is considering amputation so that his penis can be the first human specimen in the Phallological Museum in Reykjavik, Iceland
“He insisted that prostitutes should not be able to behave like that.”
– Apparently hookers can say “No”
“foreign pig” “dirty asylum-seeker”
– Phrases that are offensive, but not racist in Switzerland.
“I was completely wasted but when you are drinking you are determined.”
– A 22-year-old British man woke up in Amsterdam after getting drunk at a friend’s funeral in London
“He only had one option and it was to jump the fence, and he jumped it. He did not jump it gracefully,”
– A woman with a stun gun chased after a man that flashed her in Salem, Oregon
“I’ve almost died 80 Times”
– Meet the most allergic woman in the world
The Brian Williams version. These synch up so good.
An overly concerned Utah mother recently spent $567 to buy up all of the Van Styles’ “pornographic” t-shirts at a PacSun store after the manager refused her demands to take the window display down. Knowing that depleted stock means the store will just order more, the mom vows to return once again and buy out everything until they get the message. Sex sells, forever.
An actor who played McGruff the Crime Dog was sentenced to 16 years in prison after pleading guilty to the possession of 1,000 pot plants, a grenade launcher as well as 26 other weapons, and 9,000 rounds of ammunition.
Young prudes at Wellesley College are going crazy over Tony Matelli’s new hyper-realistic sculpture, Sleepwalker, which has been placed in a high-traffic outdoor location on the all-girls campus for his current exhibition, New Gravity. Not understanding that the sculpture is art, and not a real person, students have been petitioning that the work be moved out of their bubble and inside the art museum where only people who choose to view it, can. Very good preparation for the real world, ladies.
Drawing by HuskNitNavn
At the CELAC Summit in Havana, Cuba yesterday, the chillest president in the world (Uruguay’s Jose Mujica) briefly spoke out against formal business attire, stating that the dress was imposed on the world by the English during the Industrial Revolution, and that to maintain prestige in the world “We all had to dress up like monkeys with ties.” His point to other Latin American leaders was simply that they should try to relate to the people of their country, instead of their wealthy peers.
Is this drought in California going to last another 2 years, or 200? These are questions going through scientist’s heads as they study the long-term climate patterns in the Western states. Through tree ring and other earthly data, researchers have identified multiple 10-20 year droughts occurring over the last 1000 years, and even worse, “ancient megadroughts” happening from 850 to 1090 and 1140 to 1320. With the Colorado River being run dry, and Arizona in the midst of its own 14-year drought, the outlook isn’t too great for a quick return to the ‘wet’ years of last century. So what will happen if this drought continues for a decade or more? Farms will disappear, desalinization plants are likely, and most importantly, Californians will adapt. It won’t be the end of the world, but man, will it be expensive.
A picture of California’s drought from space. Taken one year apart. via, io9
In a business article about the demand for ethically raised pigs, the Malaysian printers of the International edition of the New York Times blacked out the swines’ faces, noting that images of pigs are not allowed in the Muslim country.
News from outside the comfort zone
KC Ortiz is a photojournalist based in Bangkok
While climbing the Bondi cliff rope, Bondi Beach bodybuilder and “larger-than-life mate” Dimitri Moskovich lost his focus due to a presumably remarkable pair of breasts, fell two stories onto rocks below, and fractured both of his legs.