Roger Gastman Goes To The Movies: Project X

I was so excited when I saw previews for Project X. I put the release date on my calendar and everything. Planned to see it on the first screening. I’m lazy I suck and I didn’t. Several of my friends called and emailed and texted and told me to stop everything I was doing and go see it that second. I finally went by myself cuz I’m a loser.

I am still shaking from it. It’s like someone went into my brain and took a zillion of my life experiences, and dumb things we dreamed happening (midget in an oven). I didn’t laugh once during the movie. My eyes didn’t blink. I don’t know how I’m going to sleep tonight. Like I think that movie was real. I’m confused. Now I know how war vets feel when they see war movies and have a flash back.

Also, the movie takes place in Pasadena. I was there today at my DR. for my yearly check up. Once again he didn’t believe me that I don’t do drugs or smoke or drink. Motherfucker. But he was psyched on me cuz I lost close to 20lbs since I was there last. Don’t worry people, I am still a fat fuck.

You know where I am going to be Wednesday, Thursday and every night the rest of this week? That’s right, by myself at the movies watching Project X over and over again. The only downside is that I didn’t eat my peanut M&Ms or drink my Barqs Root Beer – I was too taken in by the film. True cinema. Big Shout out to my dawg Eugene Levy & Stiffler’s mom in the American Pie Reunion film preview I saw before Project X.

Roger Gastman

4 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. why the fuck is this clown still showing up on your blog?
    the dude is a decent “curator”, that’s it. what the fuck is the post even supposed to be about? he goes to a movie, he watches it, then talks about it. it’s neither informative nor is it comedic. it does nothing but waste space on your blog. i’d rather you put the proclaimer’s 500 miles video in his spot. fuck it dude, i’d rather you put a chumbawumba video in his spot.
    fuck roger assman, corny ass wannabe fuck face.

  2. Roger

    i love the comment.

  3. Zilla

    This guy’s crying hurts me ears and the amount of hater tots this dude ate leads me to believe he’s at least a 4 biller. Chumbawumba? Get a grip dickfingers and shit in your hand.


  4. nigga please

    Roger, there’s only one way you keep appearing on this site. You must have done some gay shit with the dude who runs it, or you must have done some gay shit with the dude who runs it.
    And I still don’t know how the fuck you’re even on anybody’s radar. That fuck ugly tattoo should be a dead giveaway that you’re a fucking dumb ass and don’t know shit about art. How the fuck are you still alive……..

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