Nips: 99 Bananas

A night of drinking 99 Bananas is a great way to appreciate Jeff Koons. It’s pop. Start off easy, mixing it with RC Cola and laughing about the giant puppy he built out of flowers in Rockefeller Center and then, after you’ve moved on to 99 Bananas on the rocks, you can get a little more weird and discuss his life-size porcelain of Michael Jackson and Bubbles. Late night, when it’s 99 Bananas right out of the bottle, take some time alone for close examination of the photo-realistic paintings he made of his Italian porn star ex-wife. Before long you’ll be curled up with an inflatable lobster, snoring away and dreaming 99 Bananas dreams filled with giant reflective hearts.

99 Bananas tastes like melted yellow Popsicles mixed with turpentine. It’ll make you smile.

—Arlo Crawford

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