Hey there you bedwetting backstabbers, it’s Gene P reporting to you after an epic 2 hours of 90210 where the plot lines were more abundant than shaved heads and combat boots at a Barnard party. And with a larger-than-life cast consisting of Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development and Uncle Jesse’s wife from Full House, I found myself asking where most of the cast from the original show is now? Well if you’re not Brenda Walsh, Kelly Taylor or Max from The Peach Pit, you’re frantically calling your agent to score a cameo back at West Beverly High, cause this shit left me California screamin!
Before the show even started (for the second time), after a blaze of commercials from Wendy’s, Clearasil and various hair-care products, it was grotesquely obvious that Gene P is a charter member of their target audience. I won’t ruin what happened for those of us who haven’t seen the premiere yet, which is available for viewing on the C-Dub’s website. But I will say that in the first hour alone Dixon got kicked off the lacrosse team AND got readmitted back on. And in a move which made evident the breadth of the show’s writers, he got kicked off again in the second hour. But like I said, I’ll leave it up to you to find out whether history repeats itself and he gets let back on, again, in the second hour. Or if it just repeats itself the one time, that is, in regards to him getting kicked off the lacrosse team. Without a doubt, this show spells drama with a capital “D”. There were more tears in one episode than the time the Enablist found out Andy Roddick was engaged. And with a hot chick count closing in on 6 (up from the original’s measly 2.5) the promise of this instant classic won’t risk being torpedoed by fuglies or butterfaces like Andrea Zuckerman and Donna Martin, respectively. Welcome BACK to California my hotsauced-handjobbers, cause this is high school, West Beverly style.